Have a heart attack...your way

Things like this make me proud to be an Amerkin. I wonder if you can get chili on it, if you ask nicely. Check the "Nutritional Information" under "more details", if you have the stomach for it.

In Praise of the King of Fools

The top ten reasons why KOF´s wish for peace won´t be fulfilled. Here we go:

10) Failing to blind copy a message is a sin. Moreover, by revealing the recipients, it makes my decision to post this entry an understandable, though perhaps unwanted alternative to “reply to all”.

9) Technically, one can´t pray to girl saints; at least not with the boy saints´ blessings.

8) The motivation to send the message—not unlike mine, that is, before I went over the five-minute deadline trying to decide whether of not I could just send it to the same people—was one long built on Pascal`s wager (paranoia).

7) The stars will never be aligned properly for such madness.

6) If God had meant for world peace, He wouldn’t have written such a controversial book.

5) Who says the world isn`t peaceful already? Naysayers, that’s who!!

4) Like most people, KOF probably missed the part about not deleting the message. I´m pretty sure it means, "never delete it," and not just, "don`t delete it before sending it." I see this as an intentionally, dirty trick.

3) The Homeland Security Act precludes it.

2) The originator didn’t say, “Simon says,” and KOF didn’t say, “Mother, may I?”

1) KOF deserves a hell of a lot better than world peace!!!

See this Slate article. Pretty funny.

"Important Changes to Your Citizenship Agreement
Please read and retain for your records."
By Evan Eisenberg
Posted Friday, March 25, 2005, at 4:19 AM PT

Connected

Well, I´m surfing with the radiowaves finally, though I had to go down the street to do it. I´m sitting in Boxhagenerplatz. Imagine Central Park scaled down to the size of a football field. I still haven´t connected to the network to which I intended, but I recieve it´s signal.

Perhaps one of the boys could recommend a good antenna? Then maybe I could keep my lazy ass at home. What kind of range do they have, and how does one go about connecting and mounting them?

Terri's "Supporters"?

Why is it that every picture of a group of lunatics fighting desperately to keep Terri Schiavo out of heaven, they're described as Terri Schiavo supporters?

Arianna Hates Freedom

Sorry, I don't mean to keep posting things of a political nature. God I wish California had elected this woman!!!!

Trixie, Dixie, and Bill Bixby

We now have six animals: a set of pets comprising three cats and three dogs, three females and three males, two black animals and two speckled/spotted animals, and two animals of light white or orange color--not totalling eighteen as this list indicates; I don't know how to list these variants. Our newest pet is a male kitten with thumbs. He is sweet, soft, cuddly, gentle, and shy, and the dogs love him (and he seems perfectly happy with them). The two cats, so far, are pretending he doesn't exist. (It's only been several hours since we brought him home.)

Because of his extra two digits (one thumb on each front paw), our dog walker named him "Mr. Mittens"--and he really has paws that look like mittens. I wanted to name him "Pixie," but my male spouse thought the name to be too feminine. Please, too feminine for what? Anyway, chanting in the car to amuse myself, after arguing about biases, sexism, irrelevancy, and the feline psychology as impacted by self-image, I came up with the phrase, "Allow me to introduce you to our three cats, Trixie, Dixie, and Bill Bixby." It seems so perfect, as long as everyone understands that his name is neither "Bill" nor "Mr. Bixby," but "Bill Bixby" (kind of how it's not "Alice," but "Alice Lee").

The Wolves Watch the Money

I guess most of you know that I´m the most likely in the family to believe in aliens and conspiracies and the like. Maybe it´s my need to find a greater meaning, to compensate for my ever unfocused changing of "careers".

Substituting one Wolf for another at "The Bank of the World" has me so giddy with excitement, that I´ve forgotten to get the slightest bit upset about it. Regarding the fact that it´ll get him out of the DOD however, I must assert that there are always more like him, or yes, even worse.

NEWS FROM AROUND THE SMITH'S

Cloe already spayed. I'm having trouble burning DVDs and finding files. P's cardio appt. was moved to April 11. Seems they didn't know March 25 was Good Friday when they made the appointment in the first place. I seeth, to no avail, and missed my dentist appt. today, thinking it was tomorrow. Nuts. Ever have one o them days? Still haven't heard from the Baylor Study group. Nor from, oh crap................................

Eva Rocks in "No Time For Sergeants"

Some of you may remember Andy Griffith in the classic by Ira Levin, "No Time For Sargeants." Last weekend our own Eva Dewer Dazzler killed in four different roles in said play.
As Inductee, he was tall, dark, handsome, and laconic, the epitome of a dangerous, lady killer, cowboy. (The woman sitting beside me nearly melted to the floor upon his first appearance.
As the Testing Corporal (the Don Knotts character, you may recall) Eva was a mass of jittery, fingertapping nerves as he tested Will Stockdale's dexterity at magic rings. No one who has heard Eva speak in his normal manly voice would believe him capable of the strident, tightly strung, all around bundle of nerves we were fortunate to see Saturday night. One had to see it to appreciate it.
As the inspecting Colonel he put the fear of God into Will, St. King, and a full house--overflowing actually--audience of theatergoers.
In this reviewer's opinion, though, Eva's rendition of the navigator, Col. Cover, was the piece de resistance. His back to the audience, he worked his direction-tracking-and-- calculating-apparatus masterfully, muttering, puzzling, insisting that what the plane was flying over, although it looked looked to the rest of the flight crew amazingly like dry land, was actually the middle of the Gulf of Mexico. And he waved the Atlas to show it was true.
The time (2 hours) flew by as the rapid-paced comedy garnered one belly laugh after another.
At ten bucks for old people and students and twelve for normal adults, this show is a bargain you really must see. The perfect hectic, hilarious, howler to usher in spring in Atlanta.
This reviewer's poor skills are unable to do justice to these barrier breaking performances; suffice it to say that this geriatric pair will make the 3 hour trip again next Saturday to see the closing night performance.
We may never again be so lucky as to be in on the birth of what must surely become a cult classic amongst the cognescenti. 30 BB

"Angel Unaware" Dog from outta nowhere

I got to this post site by clicking "New post from Evadewer" and logging in with my own name & password.
The spirit of the universe, aka, fate, fortune, whatever, has sent us a dog. She showed up a couple days ago and started sleeping on my chaise on the upstairs deck. She's been dogging my heels ever since. She looks like "Cleo" or if that is unfamiliar, like a Thurber dog. Black & white & tan beagle, I think. Pert got her some food and a dish and I sacrificed the cushion from my chaise--put it on the porch outside the glass sliding doors. Pert moved the gate from the backporch to the bottom of my stairs and we are trying to transfer her attachment to Pert. Right now he has lured her on a walk to the creek with garlic baloney.
She seems so familiar, she must(might)(could be) or not be a reincarnation of somebody I knew, and I feel like we are supposed to keep her. Perhaps for Pert. Grasping! Straws! Stupidity! Maybe she is Hunter come to keep me company.




Not the dog in question

Comments on the main page: Another change

I've hacked the blog a bit to allow expansion of comments on the main page. When you click the "Comments" line, the comments automagically appear below the original post. Clicking it again re-hides the comments. Let me know if you like it, or would prefer that clicking the comments button open a new page. It's a lot quicker to navigate and read comments, but it can look a little crowded, and probably costs at initial load time. OML, your input is probably the most valuable on that front. Let me know how it performs over dialup.

"Post a comment" will still require a new page, but it appears that Google has worked on the performance of their new look and feel for comments, and it comes up pretty quickly now.

Or do you just not give a damn?

Your friendly admin

Whoa

Time to talk about Skype again

Skype is software you can download that lets you have voice conversations with other people on the internet. I have it installed, and Eva has it, too. So, when we want, we can have conversations, toll free.

Here is a wrinkle that I learned about today: They have an additional service called skypeout.

It allows you, for paid in advance fee, to call telephones via skype on your PC.

The rate to call most of the places that we all live is about 2 cents a minute. So, for example, if I sign up and post some money, I can call OML on a regular phone for 2 cents a minute. (Of course, if he gets skype, we can talk for no toll!)

Check it out.

The Evadewer and Afterdinner's Most Excellent Adventure

Went to the condo last week to finish up the cleanup and have a little fun. We opted for a little more tile in the foyer, so the work won't be complete until this week, but the place looks great. The new tile in the living room by the balcony looks great, and the walls are much less cluttered than they were, but still beach-festive. I'll post some pics over on EvaPics later.

We decided to engage in some drunken debauchery on Saturday night at a local raw bar. Well, we didn't really decide to. It just sort of...happened. Sat down at the oyster bar and slammed oysters, two dozen raw for me and three dozen lightly steamed for der missus. We both love oysters, but it took a lotta beers to wash it all down. All things considered, we had a great time that night, and didn't feel bad the next day, and in fact celebrated Valentine's day a day early with a nice dinner at an Italian restaurant about five minutes from the condo.

And then, bad stuff started happening.
On Monday, both of us started feeling a little sluggish and weak. I got diarrhea that lasted all day and all night Monday night. We both puked some, Afterdinner copiously. We got up early on Monday, got some Immodium in me, and journeyed back to Norx (in separate cars, due to circumstances beyond our control). Felt moderately recovered on Tuesday night, but a little tired from the travel and lack of food.

Then it got painful.
I awoke at about 1:30 AM with excruciating stomach pain, and used various remedies to try to alleviate it, to little or no avail. Afterdinner took me to the 'mergency at about 3:30, where they doped me up real good, gave me a CAT scan (*upper* GI) and blood work, and found an abrasion in my stomach. Prescribed me some drugs for pain, nausea, and to coat my tumtum, and recommended me to an gastroenterologist (or something like that).

So this will be fun...

Update: Pert medical info

Nothing from the neurologist yet. Her secretary said she was going to talk to the refered to doc.
Yesterday P had me check his b/p immediately upon his standing. It went from 120/80=/> to below 90/70 sometimes and unable to detect by ear other times. (I could feel it by palpating his arm.) He had been taking b/p meds for a couple weeks and seemed worse. He stopped the b/p meds (quinapril 10 mg. daily, for those taking notes, how do you make a smiley face?) and has an appointment with Toth, regular doc, tomorrow to ask for a referal to a cardiologist. He and I agree that he should have a thorough check out and another treadmill stress test to rule out--or find and treat--cardiac problems. Even though the neurologist says it wouldn't cause the problem. New post because I got tired of looking for where I was putting new updates.

Does anybody remember laughter?

koALa is lazy, but she's painted all of the trees on their land. This bears starting a new thread, and I'll just quote koALa here:

• "There are only 143 (one hundred forty three) days left till we check into the cabin on the Toccoa River this summer. Anyone who can make it is welcome. There is a hot tub, a deck on the river, seclusion, nearby snack and goodie purchasing opportunities, outdoor grill, umbrella tables, lots of land to roam, a deserted road, cable TV, and cable radio, fun and frivolity, games, la la la. Come on summer? C Day is Jul 2, 2005. Do not forget. Did I mention free?"

I, for one, can't wait.

Peer To Peer beats Pay for Play

It's amazing how having the wherewithall changes the attitude of a naysayer about downloading music.

Mania Has It's Good Side

Today I:
1. Finished and made copies of all the medical reports. I have 3 copies. One to keep, one for MAYO in Jacksonville and one I will mail to Eva when he gats back from Florida.
2. Filed our federal and state taxes on line. Got 1600. =- coming to direct deposit.
3. E-mailed to myself all the e-mail address from the laptop and all the bookmarks from the laptop and printed them so I can copy them to the new desktop.
4. Had the downstairs deck painted. Last of the painting done.
5. Paid bills.
6. But, what do I do now? It's only 6:30pm and I still got lots of vim, not to mention vigor.

In praise of koALa

"k" is for the kids that she has spawned,
"o" means only that she's growing old,
"A" is for the alcohol that I drove her to,
"L" is for the lunch she used to pack me when she didn't make me pack it myself,
"a" means accurate, and accurate she'll always be

Put them all together and they spell "koALa",
I mention this because it's her birthday.

Original poem (bottom of page)